Centrism: Lame Danger
Centrism must never be tolerated, respected, honored or held viable. That sounds like a pretty strict belief, which it is, but it’s actually a belief. Centrism is a negative non-belief. Negative. Centrism is a black-hole that engulfs everything around it until the Universe is null and void. I’m not a scientist, I don’t know what’s on the other side of a black hole, but most scientists would probably say it’s not a good thing. Just assume, I’m not a scientist. Enough about my status as not a scientist, it’s time to destroy centrism.
For those thinking this will be about your mythical non-political centrism, squash that right now. Everything is political. Centrism in politics is a non-sequitur which enables status quo loving people to never actually have to answer any complex or even ridiculously simple questions. It is a state of being that is like eating brunch while BLM and Nazis fight in the streets and asking the waiter to pull down the shades. Yes, that example seems pretty real, because it is. When I talk about Centrists I don’t talk about “left-centers”, “right-centers” or any of these fairy-tales. When I speak of Centrists I speak to all centrists who hump the status quo like a dog trying to get their nut on a leg. The status quo won’t kick them off, the status quo is a pervert who pets them. Centrism is a horny dog that is right, as the name suggests, in the goddamn middle and it’ll hump status quo complacency in vain, since centrists are neutered.
Transcend time with me and go back to Aug. 15, 2017. When President Trump said “you also had people that were very fine people, on both sides.” in reference to the “Unite The Right Rally” in Charlottesville, VA. A white supremacist rally that naturally got attention from people who thought that nazis are dangerous and shouldn’t feel safe for being nazis, because fuck nazis. An easily disavowalable movement, this was a lay-up for Trump if he just said literally one bad thing about these fuckwads, but instead he whiffed. From his planned whiff (he knows his base) came a stinky phrase Centrists adopted and reworked. “Good people on both sides” or a few other variations vibrated through the Centrists and gave pseudo-invincibility. Centrists, at any time, really want to say “Whoa fellas, can we just chill” and a few of these most honest ones just say “I don’t care”. They ultimately don’t care, embroiled in privilege, and want to avoid any talk of politics and just exist, they don’t want to live in reality, they want to grill as the world burns.
Centrists have a mass of cartilage in their heads they call a brain. It’s as smooth as a dolphin and as untouched as a basement-dweller. A vestigial organ that if removed would matter absolutely null. Centrists can’t even be milquetoast because that would mean heavily watering down a hot take by themselves. Centrists aren’t even flavorful enough to be bland. Centrists have to get erect just to be flaccid. Centrists are neutered, flavorless, null-brained losers and in politics that’s dangerous. They can adopt any neutral-sounding opinion that’s actually dangerous or useless and express it like a blank-slate to advance the rhetoric of radicals. Everything is fine as long as they can eat grain at the brunch troth, lap water, and be reminded to breathe. Centrists side with the oppressor because they promise the Centrists get to grill. Another mass shooting, Covid-19 cases going up again, racial inequality, police brutality, another mass shooting, the rise of facism, destruction of democracy, all of this gets in the way of their lazy Sunday. Good.
Centrism must never be tolerated, respected, honored or held viable. Have convictions, reservations, beliefs, fight for what is correct and never give up. Compromise seldom, all times fight until the pavement and veins beat red. Fight for what’s correct, don’t fight for what’s “fine”. Centrists, it’s current year, grow opinions. Question those opinions and grow when new evidence is presented. Learn, get some wrinkles on that mass in your skull. Give it some texture. Do better for yourself and the rest of us.
